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Sometimes it comes in a “broken” container — one that goes about in a wheelchair or on crutches. “When people meet me, sometimes they say, ‘Oh my God, she’s disabled,’” says Ruotolo, who stands (with help from her constant companions, a pair of crutches) a little over four-foot-two in her Jimmy Choos — hence the title of her memoir, Unstoppable in Stilettos.

“But once we get to know each other, those feelings go away.” “I still have the same personality, the same bad sense of humor, the same love of trivia,” says Oliver, 38, who was paralyzed in a body-surfing accident when he was 21.

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But these relationships seldom work out, says Carlson, who dove into a shallow pond at the age of instantly shattering her spine.

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