Dating a man who has been abused

She has had just two serious romantic relationships in her life.

She admits she is more comfortable with casual flings, partly because the closer she gets to a man emotionally, the less she wants to have sex with him.

It's hard to love again after you've been manipulated, put down, controlled, belittled, and made to feel worthless by someone who was supposed to love you and care about you.

As someone who's been emotionally abused in the past and can now clearly see it, I'm also able to see how it changed my idea of relationships and my approach to love. After you've been emotionally abused, being able to open up freely is painful.

May 15, 2000 -- Elizabeth Haney was sexually assaulted at school by a group of male classmates when she was 12.

Now 24, the San Francisco woman finds that repercussions of the attack have made her incapable of connecting love with sex.

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While this isn't meant to detract from the issue of domestic abuse that far too many women have suffered (and still suffer), it's to address the fact that emotional abuse can be just as damaging, but in completely different ways.Recently, Haney flew into a jealous rage when her boyfriend took a phone call from a woman friend in her presence.Although outwardly viewing the relationship as a fling, her reaction to the phone call suggested otherwise.Abused men are men and teenage boys who are in physically, mentally and emotionally abusive relationships involving partners, girlfriends or wives.Men who are abused do not get the respect, understanding, encouragement or support from society as a whole and are often criticized and ridiculed unfairly, further victimizing men who are abused."I got upset, and he tried to talk to me about it, but I wouldn't talk about it," she says."I couldn't say what I wanted to, and he got frustrated." The impact of childhood sexual abuse on adult intimacy varies from person to person, but experts say Haney's relationship troubles are not uncommon., could’ve been written by the man I was just dating!I know your site and advice are geared toward men, but want to say how helpful I find the information you provide.He almost never opened up about anything personal in 6 months, but near the end I got tidbits about his mom and some of his exes.None of it sounded good—mostly a series of women who made him feel terrible.

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